Friday, August 19, 2011

August 19 ~ Day of Hope... in loving memory of children gone too soon

Today, like countless other days, I think of my sweet son Oliver... gone too soon.  Of little Seth, Jayden, Eden, Lily and Ruby.  And their mummies longing to touch them again.  Of too many dear friends who have also had to say goodbye to their precious, and much loved little ones, taken before they could hold their dear little hands or kiss their sweet round cheeks.  

Pregnancy and neo-natal loss is real.  Every day a little life is ended, and a family is left empty handed and heart broken.  But, we "can't" talk about it.  We don't talk about it.  As mothers and fathers we just try and pick up the pieces and continue our lives in some kind of manner that is pleasing to society.  But I want to say that yes, I have a son.  No, he isn't here, but he was.  He lived, safe and warm within my womb, and although this world could not provide him the same safety and warmth, his is a part of our family.  He is our son.  

I do not and can not begin for a moment to understand "why" but I do know that God knows why.  And until I can see my Oliver again, that will be all I need to get through this life here without him.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

{this moment}

A day late, but a moment to cherish all the same. Inspired by Soulemama (can't figure out how to link from the phone but please follow the link from my other post to see her moment from the week and many others too)

If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments

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Friday, August 5, 2011

{this moment}

{this moment} - Inspired by Soulemama... a single photo - no words - capturing a moment from our week that is simple, special, and extraordinary. A moment I want to pause, savour and remember.  If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

29 days, plus 11

One of the jobs LittleBee loves to do is make sure all of the calendars in the house have been turned over to the new month. It could have something to do with being a kid and being fascinated with the passing of time. How some days it feels like every minute is being counted. Or perhaps it's her somewhat perfectionistic tendencies, most likely inherited from her mother, and her need to have everything in her world in (her) order.

Yesterday we went around the house checking and changing the calendars (we do have a few) and as she was checking the large one on the wall in the lounge room I noticed that she had stopped still, and was concentrating. A few moments passed and then she declares... "29 days plus 11 mum. Then I'll be 8". Not 40 days (which by now you may have calculated already) but 29 + 11, 29 for August and 11 for September.

I love how eager she is to turn eight, and how she awaits her special day with such anticipation.

It was only a few months ago that I turned 35, and I certainly didn't have a countdown to the big day. When do we stop counting down the days? When does time become more like an enemy and less of an exciting friend? Or when does changing months on a calendar suddenly make us groan as we realise time truly is fleeting, and is no longer met with thrills and anticipation of days to come.

When did we grow up?

So now I have less than 29 + 11 days to make LittleBee's big day a special one.

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