Monday, October 31, 2011

if my womb could talk...

... I wouldn't have to answer "that" question

Oh stranger, when you stop to admire my princesses, you wouldn't have to ask if they are the only children I have.  You would just know that I have had three beautiful children.  I know, you can only see two of them walking around with me down the street.  Our house only has two little beds for the two little people who occupy them every night.

But if my womb could talk it would tell you that it has housed, nurtured and brought forth three babies.

Three blessings.

Three children.

If my womb had a flashing neon sign you wouldn't have to tug at that piece of my heart that is still so tender, even after 5 and a half years.  My heart has been healed, but it still bears deep scars of sadness and grief.

If my womb could talk...

Friday, October 28, 2011

through the eyes of the "baby"

The iPhone... the latest and greatest toy for kids right?  My little LadyBug just loves getting hold of Mumma's phone and having all sorts of fun with it.  I often find my phone covered in who knows what kind of sticky finger prints.  After giving the screen a quick clean with a baby wipe, the fun really begins as I close the countless apps she has opened, reset my wallpaper and delete the email drafts and web pages that she couldn't access without the internet connection!

Plugging my phone into the computer to charge and access the photos has led to a delightful surprise for me this week.  I have just finished downloading more than 60 photos taken by my budding iPhone photographer.  So here's a snapshot of this week... through the eyes of the "baby"...

in the car... there were about 14 of these shots

sitting with Dadda

highchair at a restaurant x 6

self portrait

the dinner table

just a few more...

... gorgeous portraits

and the lounge room floor

{this moment}

{this moment} - inspired by Soulemama... a single photo with no words that captures a  simple, special and extraordinary moment from our week.  A moment I want to savour and remember.  If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments...

Saturday, October 22, 2011

{this moment}

{this moment} - inspired by Soulemama... a single photo with no words that captures a  simple, special and extraordinary moment from our week.  A moment I want to savour and remember.  If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments...

Friday, October 14, 2011

{this moment}

{this moment} - Inspired by Soulemama... a single photo - no words - capturing a moment from our week that is simple, special, and extraordinary. A moment I want to pause, savour and remember. If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' in the comments

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

bye bye boobies

She wakes most mornings with one request. It is usually early, before the sun comes up. She rolls over and (lovingly?) smacks me in the head as she says "Mumma. T-aaah" I open my bleary eyes to see her half sitting up in bed signing for her milk. It has been a wonderful way to start the day, just the two of us together, all snuggly and enjoying a cuddle and feed before the day really starts.

One Monday morning a few weeks ago was different though. She woke up the same as usual... with a loving slap, but instead of signing for milk she used the food sign. We have been teaching her how to use sign language to communicate her needs, and I do often give her the benefit of the doubt, but thought I would confirm with her what she wanted... "Don't you mean milk?", I ask her. She shakes her head "no" and continues to emphatically let me know that she is indeed ready for her breakfast. With a sigh I heave her out of our bed and start the morning routine for her, without the breastfeed.

Next day was the same, and the next, then the next. And now, two weeks later, there is no more "milk" sign. No more crawling up into my lap and reaching down into my shirt to try and get her milk out. No more milk.

It is a bittersweet time for me. She has been weaning herself for a while, whittling down the feeds from what seemed like every hour, to just the one, and the occasional two feeds per day. This means no engorgement for Mumma (yay). I have also had to be on a strict dairy and egg free diet because of her intolerances. So this now means that Mumma can enjoy a poached egg for breakfast once again, and not have to be overly concerned if a slice of cheese was secretly hidden in a sandwich. And 16 months of feeding is remarkable!

But still my heart is a bit heavy, thinking over the months, that have all too quickly flown by. How quick this special bonding time has come and gone. I remember that very first breastfeed. There really is something incredible about looking down at your chest, and seeing this fresh new little creature rooting for what she instinctively knows is her source of food, comfort and life. The weeks that follow are trying to say the least, but very very rewarding, as establishing a feeding routine (and milk supply) give way to precious moments of bonding and nurturing.

4.5 months old

I will miss those days, those special moments that we shared. But I can also rejoice knowing that my little LadyBug is starting to grow up, and becoming an independent little lady.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

outside my window...

... the skies are threatening to rain.  The clouds are gathering together, with their plans and schemes to saturate the unsuspecting ground below.


... two little girls are making up stories, singing songs, and bouncing around together.  Giggles and songs burst forth intermittently breaking up the silence that would otherwise surround them.  With them, is the littlest princess.  I can hear her little giggles mixed in with the bigger ones, just slightly, as they bounce with her and protect her from the world outside.


... I can hear the chirps of sweet little birds, scurrying around trying to find a mid afternoon snack.  A few of them flit past the window.  Some stop to perch upon the fence, while others can only be heard in the trees down in the yard.


... two playful little puppies next door are yapping and yipping enjoying the last little bursts of afternoon sun.  My own dog is racing up and down the patio, chasing his imagination, back and forth, back and forth.

... the wind picks up a few of the branches that I can see from my window, and gently sways them to and fro.  The wind looks as cool and grey as the sky is overhead.

And in a moment, perhaps all too soon for this relaxing Mumma, the three little princesses emerge through the door that was separating the bustling outside world with my peaceful inside one... and swiftly begin to infiltrate my silence with their girly songs and giggles... escaping the threat of afternoon rain and bringing a little sunshine indoors.

the view from where I sit

What is the view like from your window today?

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